Find a real Teacher whom you cannot buy, who tells you directly to your face what he thinks about you and how you can improve yourself. A real Teacher loves you but does not accept your failure, self-deception, and vanity. He breaks these things and sets you free.
"Soft" teachers, ones who are very sweet and polite and who do not dare to hurt your feelings, are called "caressers" in the old country. When a person is hurt because you take his mask away, it proves that his whole being is a sensitive wound, that he is not healthy. That is why he is sensitive, or touchy.
Caressers praise and flatter you. They talk about subjects that are pleasant to hear. But in the end you see that you are still the same person as you were before you met them.