How to bring out the best from others

How can we help others bring out the best in themselves? By demonstrating that we trust them. For example, you notice that someone is not dealing with you honestly: he smiles at you and congratulates you, but he criticises you unjustly behind your back. If you want to resolve this problem in a harmonious way, continue to show that you trust him, as if you suspected nothing.

Even when feigned, trust can have very beneficial effects. You will say that this is putting on an act, but that depends on what we call an act. I myself call it 'education'. It is a matter of addressing the noble part of a person, unbeknownst to him, and leading him to an awareness of his responsibilities and duties. This is not a question of lying to him, of betraying him or doing him harm; on the contrary, it is a matter of helping to awaken his true nature, his divine nature, by giving him the conditions in which to manifest it. It is not putting on an act. In order to do this, however, you must have worked on yourself over a long period of time; you must have learned to control yourself, so that you do not allow yourself to give in to the instinctive reactions of anger, retaliation and wounded pride.

-Omraam Mikhael Aivanhov